A Special Guest Post By: Courtney Mueller, Co-Producer of “Finding Thin”
I went back to therapy. And by that I mean I went shopping again. I thought I’d give Nordstrom a chance to make me feel better.
This time I didn’t go alone. I brought a friend for support. It was a good idea but ended up going awry.
We were working our way through every department- from shoes, to jewelry, to makeup, our joint therapy session seemed to be heading off to a promising start.
Then we ended at clothing.
It was regular sized woman and super thin person tackling the sometimes torturous world of fashion.
I am generally comfortable in my skin and love to use my retail therapy to show myself off. But as soon as we entered the dressing room, my confidence waned. Each shirt or pair of pants was modeled to get the other person’s approval. We trust each other’s opinions and usually can usually tell what the other is thinking as soon as we stepped out of our private rooms. Every time I tried on a new piece I smiled at myself at the mirror and then walked out for the friendly review. We stepped out and gave the look, the thumbs up or down, or gushed over how fantastic or hideous the clothes were.
This time though, I found myself suddenly self-conscious. While I would try multiple sizes in search of the perfect fit, every piece my friend tried on fit her perfectly or (even worse) was too big on her. I felt like her only problem was trying to pick what to buy from her stash while I was trying to pick out one or two items from my stash that would fit. I was jealous.
Regardless of our sizes, the retail therapy modeling session remained the same for the both of us; some tops looked great, others didn’t. And even though I was self-conscious, in a way, so was she. She didn’t love how she looked in every single thing she tried on, even if I thought she looked great.
She disproved my theory that the size zero girl didn’t existent. She existed alright, and she had the same problems as a size regular like me. She experienced the same issues, just at a smaller size. Our experience together made me realize that regardless the size, every one has their own body type issues.
Posted in Cleanse, Director Notes, Film, Food, Guest Post, Hot Topic, In The News, Personal, Production, Questions, Serious Issues, Uncategorized
Tagged Barry Roskin Blake, body, body issues, clothes, Courtney Mueller, exist, fat, fat acceptance, fat to thin, finding thin documentary, finding thin film, friends, nordstrom, proudmodel, retail, support, therapy
A Special Guest Blog By: Courtney Mueller, Co-Producer of “Finding Thin”
I love shopping. Shopping can is sometimes little addiction for me in fact.
Heading over to the department stores to check out the latest fashions and perhaps treat myself to a new shirt or pair of pants is both an adrenaline rush and a release for me. It truly is retail therapy.
But lately my therapy sessions are ending poorly.
It feels as if clothing designers are unaware or uninspired by the realistic size of the average American woman.
I’m a real woman with curves. I’m not a twig, not obese- just
regular when it comes to size. But when I’m trying clothes on, I
feel as if I’m squeezing into what my normal size should be. I’m not trying to fit into a smaller size for the vanity of a tag with a smaller number; I’m just constantly battling my standard sizes thinning down.
I wonder what Michael Kors or Diane von Furstenberg would do if they traveled the same locations as “Finding Thin” and really took note at what Americans really look like. Not everyone is a size two… let alone a size zero (what I refer to as “size non-existent”). The average American woman can’t squeeze into the unrealistic expectations that clothing designers create…
and I can assure you that she doesn’t feel beautiful when she tries.
Of course designers design for all sizes, but as soon as we reach a
select size we go from model material to plus-size clothing. There’s a reason why the racks are always full of smalls and extra smalls; the larger sizes are selling out.
Dear Designers-If all the larger sizes sell out first, doesn’t that give you an indication of what the public wants?
As for me, where is the regular? Why is there no in between?
I think everyone should occasionally indulge a little retail therapy.
Go ahead and buy that new shirt or skirt to show off whatever you are
proud of, even at that “regularly plus size”.
Maybe I need a new form of therapy.
Posted in Answers, Cleanse, Director Notes, Film, Food, Guest Post, Hot Topic, In The News, Personal, Production, Questions, Serious Issues
Tagged addict, addiction, Barry Roskin Blake, Courtney Mueller, diane von furstenberg, fashion, finding thin documentary, finding thin film, food, michael kors, obese, plus-size, proudmodel, regular, retail, spokesmodel, therapist, therapy, weight, weight issues