A Life Loss Turning into a Life Gain

I recently experienced the loss of a dog that had been my best friend for the last fifteen years. As I sat at the doctor’s office, it was the worst experience I had gone through within the last two years.

I know that some feel that a family pet is not the same as a human being in their eyes but we can agree to disagree on that point. I am not married and this dog was my immediate family.

If I could have gone with her, I possibly would have.

To temporarily soothe the pain, I stayed in bed and ordered in food that I knew were bad for me. It was emotional eating but I was very aware of it for the first time.

I just didn’t give a damn. There were friends for support but I didn’t want it. I wanted to punish myself for the loss of the dog that I felt responsible for.

While I tried and realize that it wasn’t my fault and I was doing the humane thing, but it still was my decision in the end.

I am starting to get better as I welcomed another dog that my mother adopted who is three years old. Originally, I was totally against it as I felt that it was a total betrayal.

Though I do think I am a good son who took my mother in to help take care of her and her other animals.

The interesting thing was that the dog took to me immediately and would not leave my side. Not even when I went to the bathroom.

So what was originally a dog that I did not want and was supposed to go to my mother, has now become my 2nd dog.

I feel her love and loyalty to her that I will work through any issues as she is not going anywhere.

Though the story gets even better…I was shooting a pickup shot yesterday where I went grocery shopping. I was supposed to fill the cart with a ton of unhealthy foods and I would then return then minutes after the shoot. Of course in the back of my head, I thought I would just keep them and eat my heart out.

I didn’t though and ended up returning the majority of all the foods by choice.

It just felt like it was the right thing to do for me. When people try and help you by pushing you to go on a diet, it never turns out. You have to give a damn first.

Through this emotional weight gain I’ve gained something even more…knowledge.

Advertisements

3 responses to “A Life Loss Turning into a Life Gain

  1. Dear Barry,

    I can’t express how sorry I am to hear the news. We just recently adopted a dog from the humane society 6 months ago. I have never been so attached to a pet in my whole life. He was created for our family. The picture of you two tells me how much you adored your sweet dog.

    God Bless,
    Laurie
    http://www.innerthinnerpeace.com

  2. I’m so sorry for your loss. Animals are incredible. I get sad often when I think about the day when my kitties will be gone, but I know that all I can do is be grateful for the unconditional love they have given me over the years. They really are incredible beings.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s